Welcome my friends…
I choose today to address the issue of loneliness. Loneliness is an experience that few escape, so there will be few who are unaware of that which I speak. So what is it – this loneliness thing? Physical isolation from companions… perhaps. Lack of emotional support… perhaps. An inability to reach out and connect with others who value you… perhaps. But consider, for a moment, an outrageous idea – just for a moment. Consider that loneliness is a belief in separation. Consider loneliness is a belief that there is no connection between you and anyone else.
If you believe yourself to be separate then you have to believe that about everyone else. If you believe that about everyone else then there is no way your thoughts, feelings, emotions, ideas, beliefs (all held within the privacy of your own skull) could possibly have any effect upon anyone else. And so you can think what you like, feel what you like, imagine what you like, desire what you like, believe what you like and it can have no external impact on your world unless you act upon what is within – for that is the only time anyone else can become aware of it and, therefore, be affected by it.
Consider now my outrageous idea. We are all somehow, magically, connected to one another by invisible somethings or others. Lets pretend it’s an invisible energy field – not so outrageous really for magnetism and electricity are very real, very invisible energy fields and the magnetic field of your planet goes right through you and right through everyone else too. Now imagine you hold the idea that no one could love you if they really knew you deep down, knew all your dark, and not so dark, secrets. Then the message you transmit along the invisible energy is ‘no one could possibly love me’. Now, pretend that everyone you come into contact with at some unconscious level is aware of this - it might translate into their conscious awareness as ‘unavailable for love’. If you are looking for a new house you ignore the ones with the SOLD sign and explore the ones with FOR SALE outside.
So… how to change it? Play a game in your mind. Once, but no more than twice under any circumstances, a day find a quiet place and imagine yourself surrounded by exactly the sort of people you would like to be companioned by, exactly the sort of people you would choose to be with if you weren’t so lonely. Really get into it and (this is the most important part) connect with the good feeling it generates within you and go into that feeling deeply. Enjoy the fantasy. Then whenever the ‘lonely’ feeling raises its head, remind yourself of that companioned feeling and feel it again. After a little practise you will become adept at dispelling that sense of isolation. But, and this is the outrageous part, you will suddenly find companions, of the sort you imagined, appearing in your life. If you have been diligent with the exercise you will suddenly discover that what you do within the confines of your own private mind can have a powerful impact on your external world and external circumstance and all you did was to have a thought.
Your desires are for you to experience. Do not be afraid of them, for fear will keep from you that which you would have. So perhaps you could spend some time thinking about how not to be afraid of that which frightens you…
With love,
Himal
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